I missed my blogiversary! What’s going on around here? Who’s running this place anyway?
On December 14th, HMN turned a year old. This was my very first post – I Apologize in Advance.
It’s fitting that there’s an apology in the title. That I start out apologizing for what I am going to do. I realize now that when I became a blogger, I made a presumption that my experience, knowledge and/or writing were valuable to others. That’s a huge presumption and at times feels egotistical and totally against my nature and I have to crush the compulsion to just shut-up and apologize for taking up your time.
Its one thing to write in the removed fortress of a book but it’s another thing to write and have people actually read your work and respond… Immediately. A friend once asked what surprised me most about blogging and that was my answer – having readers.
Every time I post it’s hard not to imagine people taking time out of their busy lives to read my words, and to imagine their reactions, and to assign totally fictional thoughts and critiques to totally fictional people. This is only fueled by the excitement of learning your carefully-chosen words about cancer, race or your child have been read by hundreds or even thousands of complete and total strangers. My imagination runs unchecked bringing out my inner, apologetic, critic who just wants to stay out of the way.
Almost every time I post something I have a mini-crisis. I’m probably having one right now. I’ve heard things about mean people in the blogosphere and I know, eventually, one of those people will find me. And they’ll find a flaw in my writing, or more importantly, my character. They’ll point it out and there it will be for everyone to see. It’s only a matter of time.
But that hasn’t happened. Maybe someday it will, maybe someday it won’t, but for now I’m going to celebrate that worst fear unrealized and I’m going to revise my answer to my friend’s question. The thing that surprises me most about blogging: how nice, loving and generous everyone has been with their comments. And for that, dear reader, I thank you.