The dog chewed her first bumper/throw toy apart almost immediately, but a quick duct tape repair lasted a few months until she recently tore it apart for good. I went to the pet store and bought her a foam ball with a shock cord loop designed to work as a slingshot. She chewed it to bits within days, and I’m still finding mysterious piles of blue foam in the forest (what kind of fungus is that?). This time I bought another bumper like the first because it was my only choice. Paul took that bumper by the rope, wound it up a few times (that champion waffle ball pitcher’s arm of his can really launch a dog toy) before letting it fly off the end of the deck right into the upper branches of a douglas fir. Perfect. Back at the pet store, this time I decide to buy a Frisbee. It’s durable, chewable, floatable, less likely to be caught in a tree and bright orange so it can be located in grass or water. I think it’s a winner.
Norah’s a fast, aerodynamically-shaped dog with nothing between her ears to slow her down. She could really be one of those Frisbee dogs. She could totally pluck that orange disk right out of the air. Go Norah Go! It’s time you make something of yourself! It’s time you start pulling your weight around here. I show Norah her new Frisbee and all I get is her frantic wheresmyball, wheresmyball, ohmygod, someoneispayingattentiontome howcouldInotfindballatatimelikethis, mustfindball reaction. I throw the Frisbee off the deck. Nothing. She has NO interest (wheresmyball). I try several more times over the weekend, again and again. Still nothing.
Then, miraculously, the lost hanging-from-a-tree-like-its-a-Christmas-ornament dog toy drops from the sky. We’re back in business. Until… Norah tears off the outer layer of fuzz and cracks it open like a pistachio. Done.
I’m not even going back to the pet store because I know they don’t have anything else. We’re out of options. Anyone out there got any ideas for me?
Maybe I don’t need a pet store at all. Maybe I need an athletic store where I can buy cans and cans of tennis balls. She can chew right through them and we’ll always have another. Or maybe we don’t need any store at all. Maybe we just need a beach with sticks. Only driftwood for this dog. Or, maybe I just need a kitchen and a few strips of (nitrate-free) bacon. Yes, that’s it. Next up: frying the Frisbee in bacon grease. To be continued…